Saturday, 29 October 2011

Jim didn't fix it (with lyrics)

Like most children of my age, I wrote to Jimmy Savile to see if he could fix it for me.
I didn’t think there was anything strange about a man in a gold lame shell suit smoking a fat cigar and giving out medals to kids. I just knew he made A-Maze-Zing things happen.

I wrote to ask him if I could be in the Martini advert on my roller skates. If you can’t remember what I’m talking about (or you’re far too young), here’s a clip.
Needless to say, Sir Jimmy didn’t fulfil my request to star in a advert for an alcoholic beverage, wearing a skirt no bigger than a belt and probably shown long after I should have been in bed.
I wrote to him again to meet my all-time hero, Bryan Robson. No response there either. But I did eventually meet him outside Barcelona Airport before the ‘99 Champions League final against Bayern Munich. What a day to meet him, had my photo taken and everything.
Unfortunately I got so drunk that I lost the camera. How’s about that then.
RIP Sir Jimmy 1926-2011
Your letter was only the start of it,
One letter and now you're a part of it,
Now you've done it, Jim has fixed for it you, and you and you.

There must be something that you always want to do,
The one thing that you always wanted to,
Now you've done it, Jim has fixed it for you, and you and you and you

Bah-bah-bah
Bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah

Bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah-bah
Bah-Bah-Bah

Jim has fixed it for you, and you and yound you-ou-ou